Wellbeing

Psychology: Dr Nicola Davies on how to spot a sociopath

By Dr Nicola Davies

Top psychologist Dr Nicola Davies warns:beware the sociopath

Top psychologist Dr Nicola Davies warns:beware the sociopath
Meet the sociopath; the person without a conscience.

Sociopaths are extremely narcissistic individuals driven primarily by the immediate gratification of their own needs, with no regard for others. Frequently, they are skillful at drawing out and manipulating people’s sympathy – usually by portraying themselves as victims of some misfortune. Consequently, they often get away with murder, both literally and figuratively.

THE SOCIOPATH

KEY TRAITS

It can be difficult to spot a sociopath, which is why many achieve excellence in various careers, have families, and blend in easily within society. They could be your mother, your brother, your neighbour, or a work colleague.This is why those sociopaths who commit antisocial deeds are often only caught long after the act.

Nevertheless, while they might be difficult to detect straight away, here are some tell-tale signs:
They will make an effort to win your sympathy and trust.
They use charm to get people to like them.
They are extremely selfish, and value instant gratification to the point where they’ll think nothing of harming others who stand in their way.
They lack empathy, and have no affection or consideration for others.
They have a tendency to make you feel like you owe them something or that you are just like them.
They have little interest in anyone or anything from which they can’t personally gain.
They are masters at deception.

Positives

Unlike other personality types, there is virtually nothing good about sociopaths. This is because any charm and ability to entertain that they have is likely to be used to entrap and manipulate you into owing them something in return. While their ability to observe, read and understand social behaviour is nothing short of remarkable, they use this knowledge to convincingly mimic real feelings others have but they don’t.

Negatives

The sociopath often leaves you in a state of anguish and misery. After spending time with a sociopath, you are likely to feel the following:

You have been used and the person doesn’t care about you.
If you don’t do what they ask of you, they make you feel guilty.
You feel the person takes advantage of your kindness, and does nothing to give back in return.
The person often leaves you feeling afraid,worried, or confused.
Refuses to take responsibility for anything,and is quick to blame others for mishaps.
Lies to you and others repeatedly.
Has emotionally or physically hurt others a number of times without expressing any remorse.

HOW DO I DEAL WITH A SOCIOPATH?

If you have good reason to suspect somebody you know is a sociopath, avoid the person altogether. If this isn’t possible, keep your distance. These people are immune to being helped, and have no interest in getting treatment; after all, there’s nothing wrong with them, as far as they are concerned.

Don’t fall for their pretentious charming qualities or flattery – they often go to the extreme with this,even if they don’t know you. Resist feeling brave and thinking you can outsmart a sociopath through arguments or playing their seductive games. Your task is to protect yourself, not to get lured into their dangerous traps. Remember, these individuals don’t care about you or anyone else.

AM I A SOCIOPATH?

You could be a sociopath if you:

Harm others without feeling any guilt or remorse.
Have no problem disregarding other people’s rights in order to get what you want.
Often use the phrase, “You owe me.”
Lie and deceive easily and without care.
Don’t think about the consequences your plans or actions will have on others.
Treat people as little more than pawns, who are primarily there for your amusement.
Like pitting one person against the other, often contriving lies and casting blame in the process.
Have no problem humiliating someone in public or undermining another person’s good efforts.
Have no meaningful relationships, and feel no affection for anybody.

Both psychopaths and sociopaths have a complete disregard for the feelings of others. The distinction between these two personality types,however, is that psychopaths are more flamboyanta nd like others to see certain aspects of their personality.