Ace-Intimate-health

Make space for Your Relationship

Can feng shui enhance your love life? NH investigates…

It’s easy to get carried away fantasising about what our homes could look like – raise a hand if you’re guilty of letting the hours slip by while scrolling through Pinterest? But before you set off to your local DIY store to purchase some paint, it’s worth thinking about how styling and arranging your home could benefit your relationship. “Feng shui, which translates to ‘wind and water’ (two of the earth’s flowing elements) is the Chinese art of placement which dates back to 4,000 B.C,” says Maeve O’Sullivan, TCM practitioner at Escapada (escapadahealth.com). “The idea behind feng shui, is to enhance the flow of qi, which is the life force of spiritual energy. If you had to pick one room in the home you definitely want to feng shui – it’s your bedroom. “The bedroom is the most important room of the home, as it’s the most personal to you and your partner. Besides that, you spend many hours sleeping in this room and sleep is essential to our body and immune system as it only works well when we’ve had the right amount of rest.”

Building a healthy home

The five elements of feng shui are water, wood, fire, earth, and metal,” explains Maeve. “Each element brings forth its own properties, and when in balance they become the building blocks of a happy, healthy home. We need the presence of all five in our home in order to thrive, be grounded and feel healthy.” With every element in Chinese medicine there is a corresponding system of senses, colours and emotions and, just like a balance of all of these are required within our bodies, the same applies to feng shui in our homes. “If one element becomes dominant, it can overpower another and cause an imbalance. Understanding this cycle will help you strengthen the elements you might need in your space in a subtle, but very powerful way.” Feng shui in the bedroom is designed to help you rearrange your belongings in a way that will support your sleep and overall health, as well as creating romantic connections with yourself and your partner – we all know that if we sleep better, we’re a lot more loving to the people around us! Here are Maeve’s top tips on where to start:

Create a harmonious abode

1. Remove clutter: This will help turn your bedroom into somewhere serene and welcoming. Clutter disrupts the flow of energy through your home, sometimes leaving pockets of bad energy in places. In Chinese medicine, it’s thought that this can affect your health, mood and even your energy levels if you don’t regularly clear out your stuff.

2. Rearrange your furniture: In order to use your bedroom furniture to attract love, it’s best to arrange your bed in the commanding position. Move it so that you can see the entrance when you are lying in the bed, but not in direct alignment with the door. This arrangement can subconsciously boost your confidence because you’re able to see who is entering your space, without feeling startled or vulnerable.

3. Remove the past or negative energy: Take a good look at what you have stored under your bed. The items under where you sleep affect you while you’re in a passive ‘yin’ state. Whatever you have under there may also represent or create subconscious blocks in your life. Even letters from ex-partners may prevent you from cultivating deeper bonds in your current relationship.

Balance your bedroom

“Any furniture pieces that are built to support you are very important in feng shui,” says Suzanne Roynon, an interiors therapist and the author of Welcome Home: How Stuff Makes or Breaks Your Relationship. “It’s common sense that if these pieces are not sturdy, or worse, totally absent, you won’t feel supported. This is especially true of your headboard when it comes to love and romance. With a headboard, you have the necessary backing and support to create a stable, happy, healthy career and marriage.” In feng shui, headboards provide a feeling of support in life. “Wood is best for a headboard, but fabric is fine if securely attached to the bed. Avoid metal or a headboard with slats as they have the same ‘cutting’ energy you’re trying to avoid in such a relaxing space. “Have matching bedside cabinets with a pair of lamps to provide you with the sensation of balance. If you currently live alone but want a partner, leave one cabinet empty to give them space to share your life.” It probably goes without saying, but it’s good to give your bedding a spring clean once in a while. “Dry clean or replace duvets and pillows each year – they’re magnets for dust mites which feast on discarded skin particles. Aside from being horrible for asthmatics, sleeping in a soup of skin cells, potentially from previous partners, is never a good idea!”

Keep it zen

Sometimes, the temptation to watch another episode of our favourite programme can be hard to resist. Is there an argument then, for keeping our TV’s out of the bedroom? Yes, says Maeve: “While feng shui strives to create a balance between yin and yang energy, the bedroom is one exception. It should always have more yin energy (vs yang) to induce calmness, relaxation and promote sleep. TV’s produce very high yang energy in feng shui. So, as a rule, we advise against placing them in the bedroom. When there is too much yang you won’t be able to settle, rest peacefully or calm any anxieties.” Sleep is vital to your health and any electronic equipment in the bedroom could disrupt it. “EMFs, in particular, are bad for this. These are electric and magnetic fields created by electronic devices and power lines (among other things). They can very easily influence our quality of sleep.” Are you a bookworm who struggles to put a good novel down? Why not debrief what’s happened in the plot to your partner so you can bond over what you’re reading.