Wellbeing

How to get what you want with clever word choices

Want to inspire confidence and get that promotion? Use the right words. We often get carried away with language, speaking without thought, which gives the wrong impression.

Want to inspire confidence and get that promotion? Use the right words. We often get carried away with language, speaking without thought, which gives the wrong impression.

For example, you could say to a room full of people, picture a chair, and get them to describe that chair and it would always be different. Because though ‘chair’ is one word in the English language, it can be perceived in many different ways (arm chair, wooden chair, wicker chair, leather chair etc). If you said picture a ‘throne’, you’d get the same description from everyone. This is because you’re using an archetype, a word that conjures up the same image for all of us. To communicate effectively, think about the words you’re using and the pictures they create.

MAKE EVERY WORD COUNT
1 Start by defining your message. What do you want to say to your boss, or the people in your team in one sentence? So you might want to say ‘employ me, I can do this job.’

2 Imagine you’re designing an advertising poster that sums up this message. What image would you use? Have a go at sketching something out.

3 Now think of a slogan or catchphrase that you feel really captures the spirit of your message and write it down.

4 Finally, come up with a single, punchy key word that describes the impression you want to leave when you finish speaking.

This exercise helps you hone your message, so that you can deliver it effectively. Rather than starting with a barrage of words and information, you limit your vocabulary to capture the essence of your message. Once you have this, you can start thinking about statements which reinforce what you want to say. Remember to keep your key word in mind, and choose words that support this idea. This technique also works well when you need to have a tricky conversation with someone. It helps you focus on what you want to say, and alleviates nervous chatter.

CHANGE THE SCRIPT
To increase your chances of success and for an added confidence boost, use the narrative structure to positively transform any scenario in your life. This is known as reflexive re-storying. We often repeat patterns, and play out the same stories in our life. For example, we might find it hard to stand up to someone and say no, and every time we’re in this situation, we play the story out by falling into our ‘yes’ mode and weakly accepting their orders. To find your voice and express yourself assertively, rewrite the story. Play it out in your mind as it would normally happen, but then imagine rewinding the film to the point of crisis, when you’re face to face with the person. Now turn the story around and tell it from a position of power, where you vocalise exactly what you want and how you feel. Write a script for this, and read it out loud, preferably in front of a mirror. This should give you the confidence to re-story your life, and manifest a positive outcome.