Ace-Menopause

Holistic health: natural ways to live with the menopause

Determined to go it alone, self-help author Colette Brown refused to see the menopause in a negative light and instead began a deeply spiritual life transition

Determined to go it alone, self-help author Colette Brown refused to see the menopause in a negative light and instead began a deeply spiritual life transition
Although the menopause made its presence felt initially with physical,mentaland emotional symptoms, the most worrying aspect for me was how it also affected the way I felt spiritually. Yes, I had the sweats that made me feel that my clothes had turned into wet clingfilm, the mood swings that terrified me and probably my family and cat. I had the exhaustion that floored me,the sleep disturbances that made me irritable and the inability to stop the tears from flowing both in sadness and in mirth and sometimes both at the same time.

A natural transition

I just felt terrible! I had empty nest feelings even though my young adult children still stayed at home. Life seemed to be on fast forward and my little pleasures were being swamped by such intense emotion and mood swings. Yet I could still see that this was not an illness.It was simply a transition from one cycle of hormonal activity into another different one. I am a non-practising pharmacist who follows a natural, shamanic path so I have the experience of both pharmaceutical knowledge and natural teachings. I felt strongly that my menopause should be natural and I didn’t wish to distort it by artificial means. There was no real medical reason that would prevent me from allowing my body to experience menopause in the way that millions of women had done before we‘learned’ that is was some sort of disease to be treated or worse, something to bypass altogether.

My spirituality has long been a force in my life and I had been happy in both my day to day practise of meditation and in the contentment that my spiritual life had brought me.

“I chose to take control of my menopause rather than the other way round”

So, I began daily meditations on how I was feeling spiritually and taking note of how I was also feeling emotionally, mentally and physically. I also identified some major hurdles as well as some very worrying emotional aspects. For these I created individual meditations and healing mantras.Spiritually, I felt ungrounded, lost and very insecure. Emotionally I felt jaded, irritable and very, very fragile. But the mental mood swings were the worst.

I knew I wanted a natural menopause with no HRT, antidepressants or sedatives. I also decided that I would not rely on herbal medicines or homeopathy, as I wanted to simply see if that with deep thought on each symptom or aspect, then meditation and mantras, I could obtain a state of spiritual flow which could help not just me but other women who wanted a simpler journey. If I had introduced a herbal remedy, I would not have truly known whether I was benefiting from the spiritual approach or if it was the remedy. Instead I returned to meditation and mantras. I am happy to say: it worked!

Spiritually, it was hard work. I realised was changing from a person who had responsibilities of a mothering nature into one who had the responsibilities of a grandmother.Grandmothers protect the whole tribe,not just their own children. They take on advisory roles and in many cultures are respected for wisdom and sincerity of vision. Spiritually, it is about seeing the bigger picture.

Some post menopausal women become very political, some find a creativity they never knew they had or never had time for before. This is empowerment any way you look at it.

So whether you look a menopause as a time for you or for others, be empowered. Don’t take no for an answer to anything you seriously believe in or want to achieve. All that energy that was taken up with a monthly bleed is yours to do what you want with it. My personal achievement of my menopause has been to have three books published. I was always creative but it flourished and I had a sense of recklessnes

I feel stronger now than ever although my body could do with a bit more time spent on it. This is my next challenge. What will be yours?

Remember too that although the menopause is a spiritual journey, it doesn’t need to be without the joys of your everyday modern life you’re used to. So,put on the touché éclat and mascara.Wear your skinny jeans or maxi dress, have some nice red wine and dinner with your girlfriends.Do whatever you feel will make you feel good. Have fun and remember when symptoms threaten to overwhelm you, don’t worry because there is always chocolate in the cupboard!

How I did it

Colette searched inwards to discover how she was changing

Each morning I looked deeply into how I was feeling. I examined how I felt emotionally,mentally, physically and spiritually. Each area took a few minutes and normally one aspect was weighing me down more than the others. I then meditated on how I really felt about it,letting every annoying thought, upset feeling and strange experience have its place and be examined. Rather than trying to ignore a symptom, I focused on it for a little while and then tried to let it go. Then I took a few minutes to ask myself what I could do that day to make myself feel better. What a joy this was! Sometimes it was giving myself more rest if I was very tired, or having time with my husband if I was feeling in need of a cuddle, and on other days it was eBay for some Cath Kidston home goods.

Then I made up a mantra to repeat throughout the day. This was normally something with a humorous edge that brought a smile to my face when I was low. I began to go deeper for bigger problems and do the same techniques for them. I tackled feelings of empty nest, lack of libido, feelings of unattractiveness and of being out of control of my life. All of these big issues got the identify/meditate/action/mantra treatment until I had an arsenal of weaponry which served me well for nearly three years. I made an effort to honour my change and make it work for me. I chose to take control of my menopause rather than the other way round.

Magic mantras

Colette devised a series of mantras which helped her spiritually to cope with the changes that were happening

FOR GENERAL WELLBEING: “I accept this journey towards moonpause. I am blessed to be here. I accept this journey towards the Grandmother. I am blessed to have made it this far.”
FOR CONFIDENCE AND PERSONAL POWER: “I believe in myself as a woman, partner, mother, sister, friend and co-worker. I am as good as the next person and WILL take my confidence and power back: if only for today.”
FOR MOOD SWINGS: “Mood, I welcome you. Emotion, I welcome you. I will breathe through you. I have control. I have power over this.”
FOR BRAIN FOG: “Menopause stole my brain; she can keep it for a while! It needed a holiday anyway!”
FOR LACK OF LIBIDO: “My libido is only hiding. I can find her and fire her up again. Libido… I am coming after you.I will find you and we will work together.”
FOR ANGER AND IRRITABILITY: “I trust in the universe to provide me with what I need. Trust kills frustration and kills anger.”